I'm always a mess. I can never keep my own secrets. I laugh too hard at stupid things. My favourite songs can make me cry. I always watch for 11:11, but i miss it more than i notice it. I live in the past, in the memories i have with the people i love. I hate thinking about reality & i'm so homesick that it`s not even funny. But not homesick in a missing my house kind of way. Maybe it's more like heartsick for all the things that i can't get back. It's hard for me to define myself. I guess i'm just a cliche -the girl who loved too hard & didn't get anything in return. I don't want to be the heroine in some tragic love story, i just want the one person who has never given me a second thought.

Wait outside,

I hope the air will serve to remind you

that my heart is as cold as the clouds of your breath,

and my words are as timed as the beating in my chest.

I think i'm thinking too much about things. This is not doing any good for me but right now, i don't see anything i can do to make myself feel better. Its quite bad news, knowing i'm helpless.

` A Y E S H A.